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Rough day

I had a really rough day.  I went to my counselling session this morning and just cried and cried. I am really sick of this. And I told him as much. He has been empathic and reassuring, but I still cry. How long am I to be sad? How much longer can I take this?

We tried to come up with some activities that might provide some respite from the darkness. I told him I didn’t know how to have fun anymore. But he pushed me to remember a few things. He encouraged me to “play”. Something I definitely don’t remember how to do. But it’s essential for me to do it.  Not every activity has to have a purpose.

That resonated with me,  so after my session,  I went to the rocky beach and watched the waves. For pleasure. Can’t say it was fun,  but it was somewhat enjoyable. And that’s something, at least.

It was the nicest I felt all day. I loved the sounds of waves crashing.

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Maybe I’ll go again tomorrow.

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2 thoughts on “Rough day

  1. Sometimes the best thing I can is to just not undermine myself through my thoughts and then with my actions based on those thoughts. This is about learning to care for and about ourselves. Until I care about, I cant care for. Congratulations on going to the water. My favorite spot on the earth is a big bend in a large river in Northern California. It is where it is so loud, it is silent. Thanks for writing your words. They help me.

  2. Im glad you were able to have some good from the water, I love the beach and it makes me so relaxed. go again in a few days or weeks it may be good for you

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